Browsing All Posts published on »November, 2010«

Breaking News: Dimeji Bankole confesses!

November 16, 2010

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Breaking News: Dimeji Bankole finally confesses that he is in fact a vampire. He declared this declaration last evening in his pitch-dark palatial mansion. He told 567B4b4 that he does not support “lighting up Nigeria” because this might lead to his demise and the demise of his friends and their generator businesses. When asked if […]

Militant Celebrations!

November 16, 2010

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A group of Militants celebrated the one-year anniversary of the Militant Amnesty Program by attacking an oil rig in Akwa Ibom last week. The men expressed to 567B4B4 when we finally caught up with them that the best way to celebrate unconditional amnesty was by hanging out with their “enemies”. The Militant Crew declared that the kidnapping was […]

Animal health: New frontier

November 9, 2010

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The Nigerian government has declared the need to replace the Ministry of Human Health with the Ministry of Animal Health. The governmental spokesperson told our team of investigative journalist of this development in a recent interview. The humans are apparently not getting any better with all the investment the government is NOT making on their health. As a result. […]

Internet V. Emeagwali

November 8, 2010

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Mr. Emeagwali declares that the internet was adopted after all. In a press conference yesterday, the celebrated mathematician and first-born son of Nigeria says he is not the real father of the internet. He explained to the Nigerian press that he adopted the struggling boy in an American orphanage and made him into the amazing […]